Bottled Up Feelings

Sometimes I spit out some dangerous
words based on how I’m feeling, I’m fighting
hard to get my emotions out without
hurting anybody’s feelings my past is eating
away at my sanity, in a way I’m still
hanging on to my bottled up feelings,
so I’m not making progress.

Opposites Attract

Opposites attract, and in this case,
it’s strictly sexual nothing to talk about;
nothing in common. It’s a free spirit trying
to woo a homebody, a detached person
versus someone emotional; it’s a pointless
relationship; they’re better off by themselves.

Too Focused On The Past

I’ve nursing some sore wounds that keep
oozing pus; I keep digging up those
old bones in my closet while growling
at my past as if I am an animal. My mind
feels tormented from time to time; I spend
my nights fighting sleep, the past stings
like a bee; I want to scream, the trauma
keeps popping up; I want the pain to end.

I’m dealing with a lot of anger; it’s spilling
out everywhere; I have a hard time coping
with forgiveness, so I’m keeping my distance.
I need room to heal and space to breathe,
think, forget, forgive, and understand
my past and where I’m going.

Suffering

Swimming in his pain and drowning in
his unhappiness, he throws all logic
out the window; on the brink of
walking off the ledge, he dreams of
peace, the only peace he can find
it takes a lot every day to wake up every day
he’s trying to find a reason not to say
goodbye for the last time, every time
he walks out the door with suicide on his mind

for brothers like mine who struggle every day with living or dying