#1
Her family and friends won’t admit it;
no one wants to talk about it,
everyone goes out of their merry ways to avoid
her depression,
her destruction,
her suicide attempts;
her desperate cries for help.
She was a ticking time bomb
just waiting to explode at any moment.
She wasn’t safe;
she didn’t feel safe in her own skin.
She let people
she thought would help know
she wasn’t in a safe place
but they did nothing to help;
they sincerely did not care
that she needed them
to listen to her,
to hear her cries for help
…for once.
They tuned her out,
ALL OF THEM
because they believed that she was making up
her depression,
her destruction,
her suicide attempts;
her desperate cries for help.
#2
With plenty of prayer and lots of tears,
she pulled through;
she endured all the dark days and nights
that tested her endurance;
there were many days
when she thought she wouldn’t make it
And until this day
her family and friends won’t admit it,
no one wants to talk about it
so she never coughs up her disease
because they still avoid
her depression,
her destruction,
her suicide attempts;
her desperate cries for help.
!!!!! I felt like you could have wrote this and sent to the people that once seemed to care… the people who go sick of me being depressed… I had to hide it with them… be fake. Then when i could not fake it anymore they all hung their heads in disappointment… “she’s depressed again” ugh!! they thought it was all a game to me… I even told them I wanted to die.. they could plan my funeral… I told them I could not take the pain anymore!!!! It was too much!!! i could not stand to be in my own skin. That was my cry out for help… begging them to understand! Instead they ignored me. Dismissed me as a unstable girl that how dare they allow such mean emails.
A week later I was in the Hospital fighting for my life because someone found me in my parked car behind the store I walked into and bought a massive amount of pills and 2 bottles of water. It was not joke or cry for help for me! I think thats what they think… just another cry for help. It’s sad… and yes I am angry.
Great post ! thanks for this!!!!
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Reblogged this on Poetry on a Roll.
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Soul shaking poetry, thank you. Incredible images of the inner pain-prison that is depression and the way loved ones can often pretend that they can not see the blood, even when it is spread across their lily white self image and their snowy white towels.
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http://womenwhothinktoomuch.wordpress.com/2013/08/10/suicide-no-longer-an-option
I think you may have read this, but I wanted to share it in case you didn’t.
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I checked it out. You said it was based on a real experience? That is both a scary and an eye opener.
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Yes, it was and I have not attempted suicide since!
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I’m happy to hear that. Continue to stay positive.
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http://womenwhothinktoomuch.wordpress.com/2013/04/07/the-dream-the-hope-the-promise-2/
Here is one more.
You can delete these links off your page if you want!
I love your poetry and your writing. Jeanne Marie
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These are great messages for people to read. I will keep your links on my page. They may save someone that’s reading them, at the right time.
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Thank you. They are dark but the bottom line is: suicide no longer an option…
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I understand dark. I tend to write a lot of dark as well. I have been through many dark days so I totally understand some of what you have been through, what you’re not trying to go back to, and where you’re going. The journey is long and tough at times but you are strong.
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Thank you.
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