Almost Raped

Sometimes, I remember unpleasant things that
happened to me when I was younger.

I was a teenager
being targeted by an older married man.
I don’t know what he saw in me
but he wanted me to be his girl.
I remember when he said
he couldn’t wait until I turned 18 years old.

He had his ways with showing up
at my front door when no adults were around.
And even when they were around,
he’d come in the room I shared with others
as innocently as he could
to say hi was the excuse he told
and of course he was allowed to

but I was being cornered and felt up
by someone I looked up to at the time.

Rape seemed to always be on his mind.
He was a trusted friend and I
was an unwanted mistake
the day I stepped foot in a different world
so nothing I said or did
protected me from that monster.

Although, I was blessed not to be raped by him,
it almost happened a few times.
I was overpowered and had to think fast.
For years, he tried his best to rape me but never succeeded.
Thank goodness he did not.

I remember speaking up
about the ordeal a number of times,
trying to bring light to the situation but
no one seemed to believe
a word that came out of my mouth.

It was always dismissed just as quickly as it was brought up.
My family always made excuses for him.
They defended him instead of me.

Scum

The nightmare began,
the day she stepped foot on American soil.

Back home, everything was different.
She missed home and her family and friends.
She came from a happy place.
She was loved.
She’ll always remember how loved she always felt.

She was not prepared
for anything that was about to happen.
She was introduced to depression and suicide,
they had no mercy on her,
they ripped her apart to the point
where death accompanied her wherever she went.

She felt alone, unloved and unwanted.
Everyone she opened up to dismissed her cries for help.
She went from being treated good
to being treated like a
low-down-dirty-scum-of-the-earth“.

A family member actually said
those very dirty words to her.

The things she endured
has left scars
this lifetime will never heal.